buuuuughhh

i think i'm depressed cause all i wanna do is eat grilled cheese sandwiches and chili aaalllll daaaay looooong

and i look every day in the mail for a $200 check that is not there cause i don't have enough time to work more at the chicky chick

and my face looks like a pep pizza

i think i am so stressed i'm 'pressed.

i should just get up earlier and stop reading until 3am.
problem solved. in my head.

i need to wash all the dishes.
do laundry.
tidy up a little bit.

work tonight.

find black mary janes for my costume
and dark lipstick
so i can look like this:


except a little less creepy.

look for my passport

clean out the fridge

arrange the last bit of "wait it out"

new

i love transitional seasons. they have always been my favorite.

spring, fall. cherry blossoms, falling leaves. something changing to come to life, and something changing to go to sleep for a while. and the changing process is so beautiful to watch and be a part of.

certain things are finally going to sleep in me that have been tired for so long, things i've tried to keep awake for just a moment longer.

and certain things are getting ready to come to life! color, warmth, life, joy

i'm so excited to be finding out who God sees me to be by finding out God.
not to say that God is the means by which I find the end, myself.
but that it's a beautiful process. I want to become intertwined with Christ.

the more i know him, the more i love him, the more i'm changed. the more i discover him, the more i trust him, the more i believe and become the things he says i am. the more i know him, the more i want to know him, the more i want him in everything.

hey!

these are things i'm happy about

my room being clean
my laundry being done
my hair being curly
a car full of awesome girls on their way to pick me up and take me to the beach RIGHT NOW
new songs coming



these are things i'm looking forward to

spending some quality time in the Lord's presence this weekend at emerald isle
working with crossnore school again next friday
hopefully going to raleigh next weekend
halloween costume show with michael alvarado
nashville!!! for mike's showcase

lastsemester gettin it DONE!

past midnight, freezing, update, synapse

my nose is all sniffly and i can't wait to get it bed and read a few chapters of a good book.

i've been arranging for the past hour or so for ear candy. "wait it out" - imogen heap

alto II is all done! half of sop I is done. it's easier to start with the highest and lowest and then fill in. i feel very accomplished tonight.

no work again until friday.
and then a freeee saturday!!!
and then a wedding on sunday, where i get to dress up in my fabulous betsy johnson dress!

karis is coming wednesday to camp out on the couch.

i get to go to the fair soon with someone who is quickly becoming one of my closest friends.
funnelcakebloominonionfriedcandybarssaltandpeppershakerthezipper!!!!

i am working on a new song of my own.
i can't wait to record.
yes, record.
no more crappy garageband singles.
an actual recording.
pray pray pray that this happens!!

i miss jessica lyndon ray.

i am going on the beach retreat with new life for fall break!!
what a much needed time spiritually and relationally.

i miss my sisters.
sisters, if you are reading this,
know that i miss you and i want to spend time with you
and i'm so looking forward to next semester when i'll be in raleigh with you
and your fams.
true story.

next semester update to come!
it's exciting.

call mrs.pepple, sam.