summer?

tomorrow morning marks the beginning of my intermediate spanish I and II class.

8-12, M-F.

send prayers, encouragement, and big fat cups of coffee my way.

this is why i sleep in a ball in the middle of my bed.

today i woke up at 2 pm.

last night i slept with all the lights on because i heard alien noises and knew a big slimy monster hand was going to grab at my feet if it was dark.

yes, i am 21!!

so that's why i woke up at 2 pm. probably the crappiest, scariest then funniest now night since the second grade.

so today i woke up at 2pm
i put on shorts that say "LOVE PINK" on the back and made myself some coffee.
i realized, i am not very good at making coffee, but i liked it anyway.


i went to the financial aid office.
for reasons i would go into but probably shouldn't because i'm still emotionally distraught-
appalachian state university financial aid office goes on my BLACK LIST.
right before mcdonald's cancer burgers and right after WalMart.

it made me cry, also the most child-like cry i've had since the second grade. might have something to do with getting zero sleep because of irrational fears about aliens, ghosts, and burglars.

lists to make me sleepy. better than counting sheep.

things i like, in general:

good dreams you try to go back to
fresh flowers of any kind
a good marathon on tv
the cheap luxury of bath and body works
being around books, but not necessarily reading them
new underwear and pajamas
scriptures
a solid cry when you haven't cried in a while
getting up super early for a good reason (trip, farmers market, fellowship, big breakfast)
cheerwine floats
astronomy picture of the day
holding hands
the drive from boone to tennessee
getting pictures developed
going places, and luggage in general
foreign things, and travel culture
eating well
really, amusement parks
new journals
good writing pens
dave matthews band during the thick heat of north carolina summers
if you give, you begin to live. helping out, just because.
crunchy peanut butter
the songwriting zone
beaufort, north carolina


things i do not like, in general:

the hip idea of "just being real". people try so hard to "just be real" and that defeats the purpose, don't you think?
i especially dislike when that is used as a standard for others. "he/she is just not real". everyone has a reason to act the way they do, however "real'' or "not real". in that way, everyone is real as is.
boys with road rage
people who think that being polite and soft-spoken equates to being without an opinion or without the ability to speak with conviction.
likewise, people who speak to me like i'm in third grade.
car problems. you never expect them and they always cost the most in money and time.
boys who are serial flirts/daters



here are a few rabbit-trail lists, too, while i'm at it!

some good things about running:

feeling like your organically a part of the surroundings
the music while you run that makes you push harder than you thought you could go
the burn in your chest
the cleansing feeling it gives you
the first glass of water post-run (thanks to stephie for that one!)
getting really sweaty


some bad things about running:
it sucks
people watching me run
getting whistled at or honked at while running
cramps & shin splints
people who run with their make-up on
getting really thirsty, and thereby getting spitty


what makes good music good to me:

makes me want to be creative
takes me to a different place in my head
makes my heart beat faster
good for a road trip
music i can literally picture myself running with my arms open to, just like in the last scene of the movie "powder".

hopefully i'd be more tan than him, though. haha!


the "if i had a crap-ton of money" list:

i'd eat well.
grocery shop at earth fare and whole foods and fresh market.
eat at the peddler steakhouse for my birthday.
buy my mom and dad a house.
go on a trip with my sisters.
give them a lot of money.
travel to sweden, iceland, greece, and too many other countries.
pay back what i owe.
invest.
IRA, Roth IRA, college savings for my kids, trust funds, etc.
support ministries of many kinds!
buy really pretty underwear and pajamas.
wear american eagles new "f.i.t." line of work-out clothes. yesss i know.
have a nice wedding.
make an album with amazing sound quality.
collect art.
have a log cabin made out of real wood. but not too big of a log cabin.
get a netflix account.
buy a digital camera.


aaaand goodnight!